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Cheers - AE

Monday, 27 July 2009

More lunacy from Tasmania.

Guess what they want to ban in Tassie now.

Go on...

Given up yet? Okay, I'll tell you. 18th and 21st birthday parties. I am seriously not making this shit up.
YOUNG Tasmanians will no longer be allowed 18th and 21st birthday parties if Labor accepts a controversial proposal.

The Beltana branch of the party wants the State Government to do away with the traditional 18th and 21st bashes that often end in drunken violence and under-age drinking.
Oh for fuck's sake. If it's not the Tasmanian Liberals being, er, illiberal, it's the bloody Labour Party. So what do these fucking clowns suggest Tasmanian teens do to celebrate their majority instead.
"In recognition that many former traditional ceremonies of transition to adulthood -- such as 21st birthday celebrations, debutante balls and national military service -- are no longer widespread in society or accorded the degree of significance by families and communities as in former times, the conference asks the State Government to commission an examination of possible new modern civic community celebrations," the branch proposition says.

It proposes a certificate for reaching the age milestones...
A certificate? Whoopee! That'll get them queuing up. A party or a certificate. Hmmmmm, that's a toughie. Thinking back to when I turned 18, would I have opted for a certificate instead of marking the occasion by legally buying my old man a pint and having a party later?

Would I fuck, even with a ceremony. This is the dumbest idea to come out of Tasmania since, er...
... and, following on from a suggestion by the Liberals last week, the ceremony may even be linked to when teenagers get their chance at a driver's licence -- if they have shown responsible behaviour.
... yeah, that suggestion from the Liberals. Just a quick reminder, fellas:

1. Showing or characterized by broad-mindedness; "a broad political stance"; "generous and broad sympathies"; "a liberal newspaper"; "tolerant of his opponent's opinions".
2. Having political or social views favoring reform and progress.
3. Tolerant of change; not bound by authoritarianism, orthodoxy, or tradition.
4. Given or giving freely; "was a big tipper"; "the bounteous goodness of God"; "bountiful compliments"; "a freehanded host"; "a handsome allowance"; "Saturday's child is loving and giving"; "a liberal backer of the arts"; "a munificent gift"; "her fond and openhanded grandfather".
5. Not literal; "a loose interpretation of what she had been told"; "a free translation of the poem".

1. A person who favors a political philosophy of progress and reform and the protection of civil liberties.
2. A person who favors an economic theory of laissez-faire and self-regulating markets.
As I've said before, I don't see "bossy bastards who like to set everyone else rules to live by" in there anywhere. This just seems like the fucking Liberals and the fucking ALP trying to outwhore each other for votes from the kind of tedious pricks who hate anyone who knows how to fucking enjoy themselves, just the way the Tories and IngSoc NuLab have been doing in the UK, and for that* I despise them all.

But to get down with the kids for a moment, how do teenage Tasmanians feel about it?
Hobart teenager Maggie Bold, who coincidentally was preparing to attend an 18th birthday party last night when she spoke with the Mercury, said the idea had merit.
Oh God, someone pass me a bottle of whisky and a shotgun. That's just too depressing for words. Oh, but wait (my bold):
Maggie will celebrate her 18th on August 12 and was planning a quiet dinner with friends but has been coaxed into having a party.

"I don't think we should stop having big parties, it should be a person's individual choice, but if people want to attend a community event they should be allowed to," she said.

"So it's not such a bad idea perhaps."
Thank fuck for that. "Individual choice", yes, exactly. As for your cautious support for ceremonies and community events, Maggie, let me tell you that people who become Aussies instead of being born Aussie get that sort of thing when they get their citizenship certificate. You stand up with everyone else about to be officially Aussie and take the oath, and afterwards you get your certificate and a small pot plant. Don't get excited, it's just a plant that comes in a pot. Hey look, if that grips your shit for how to have a good time turning 18 or 21 in Tasmania then there's nothing stopping you. But to make it the only option? Jesus Christ, even the fucking wallabies there are on Class A drugs and apparently "they seem to know when they've had enough" - the least you can do is let teenagers have parties. Sure, some will be irresponsible and get out of hand, but that's what the police are for, right? Why not just nick the troublemakers and let the responsible remainder enjoy themselves.

What is it with Tasmania at the moment?

*Among other things of course.


JuliaM said...

"I am seriously not making this shit up."

Someone commented at my blog the other day that he has to doublecheck that he isn't reading the 'Onion' or 'Daily Mash' sometimes.

Now, I know how he felt...

What makes these people feel perfectly OK about seriously suggesting these things? Were they dropped on their heas as babies.

If not, maybe they should have been.

Angry Exile said...

Yes, I've had that same sensation of typing out something so mad that it really does seem like a spoof. I've no idea if they were dropped on their heads as babies but I think the main reason is simply trying to outwhore each other for the NIMBY vote. Or just because they're repellant authoritarian shitemunchers who get hard ons telling other people what to do all the time.

Is it worth trying dropping them on their heads now, do you think? Might not fix anything in their heads but if we can get them to land face first a broken jaw will at least make them shut the fuck up for a while.

Dick Puddlecote said...

Good grief. Even NuLab wouldn't dream up anything so silly ... would they?

(though I wouldn't put it past Lardy Liam Donaldson to suggest it).

Dick Puddlecote said...

One other point, I seem to remember from an uncle of mine who lives in Brisbane, that Aussies tell Tassie jokes like we (used to be allowed to) tell Irish jokes?

Is this true? If so, initiatives like this make for easy comedic target practice.

Angry Exile said...

I'd heard Tasmania and New Zealand were interchangeably the butt of the same sort of jokes the English tell about the Irish, Welsh or even parts of England itself that are supposedly a bit backward. Funnily enough though I've not actually heard any Tasmanian or Kiwi jokes. Some comedians on a TV show the other day were having a pop at Adelaide and I heard a joke about Adelaide Crows supporters, so maybe the target has changed.

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