Hoist on their petard

Via Leg-iron I see that a council is telling its drones slaves serfs employees that any talking, tweeting, Booking of Faces etc that isn't strictly work related is verboten and if they want to do it then they should clock off first, just like the smokers are made to (my bold).

The email states that if workers want to hold conversations about issues such as the weather, babies or holidays - they should clock out.
It also warns against social-networking, sport or fashion websites, looking at photographs and posting adverts on for-sale or wanted websites.
It reads: “Staff should log into systems first thing and not "catch up on gossip".
“Smokers are required to clock-out when they want a cigarette. Surely it is not unreasonable to expect you to clock-out if you wish to have a 10-minute conversation with a colleague about the weather?"

And cue the professional offence and indignation.

Ged Craig, the GMB Union representative, said the message was a "disgrace".
He added: "It's ridiculous and a disgrace - it is suggesting that if, for example, you are standing in a queue for the photocopier having a chat you should clock out."

And where you you, Ged, when smokers were being told they waste time? Were you there pointing out that with any number of tasks it's quite possible to smoke at the same time? When the smokers had been herded out of the building did you note that they could use the opportunity to discuss work related matters, and that it would therefore be little different to, oh I don't know, say having a ten minute conversation about the weather while you're doing some photocopying? You may personally have felt that way, Ged, but I couldn't find any evidence online and I certainly don't recall the GMB Union speaking out along those lines.

Not surprisingly when a union starts to grumble, the council has shown its spine by backpedalling furiously.

Dr Jason Gooding, the Council's deputy chief executive, said the matter was an "isolated incident" and lessons would be learned.

Doesn't say anything about the policy being reviewed though.

"On this occasion the approach to managing staff has fallen a little short of the high standards the city council has rightly come to expect of its team leaders and managers.
...
"We will be working with managers and staff in revenues and benefits to ensure that positive lessons are learned following this experience.
"This is an isolated incident and does not reflect the management style we are working hard to develop at the city council."

Oh, do shut the fuck up. Jesus Christ, is there anything quite so tedious and shallow as one of these public expressions of regret and non-apology? Reading between the lines I'd say that the policy might not be changed but probably won't be enforced either. They've made two serious mistakes and they know it. First they forgot that the proven model, as with smoking, is to take away a little freedom at a time until suddenly people wonder where it went. The second is that after all these years of vilifying smokers you're inevitably going to cause offence among the junior ranks of the Righteous if you compare them to someone who likes a cigarette.

Still, as much as we can enjoy the moment I think smokers and those who support them probably shouldn't laugh too hard or too long. A better tactic would be to point out that smokers are already on the receiving end of such treatment, that those who are now upset didn't protest when it was the smokers getting it, but that all the same smokers are absolutely horrified to see that the same tactics that were used against them are now being applied to harmless watercooler gossip, brief status updates and surfing the web to find out if it's likely to rain on your way home from work.

Divide and conquer has been a very effective weapon for the Nannies and Righteous. Now that they're starting to get stupid enough to turn it on themselves the logical thing to do is to help the bastards pull the trigger.