The Angry Exile: Pathetic cops.

The Hangman

Into our town the Hangman came,
Smelling of gold and blood and flame.
And he paced our bricks with a diffident air,
And built his frame in the courthouse square.
The scaffold stood by the courthouse side,
Only as wide as the door was wide;
A frame as tall, or little more,
Than the capping sill of the courthouse door.
And we wondered, whenever we had the time,
Who the criminal, what the crime
That the Hangman judged with the yellow twist
of knotted hemp in his busy fist.
And innocent though we were, with dread,
We passed those eyes of buckshot lead --
Till one cried: "Hangman, who is he
For whom you raised the gallows-tree?"
Then a twinkle grew in the buckshot eye,
And he gave us a riddle instead of reply:
"He who serves me best," said he,
"Shall earn the rope of the gallows-tree."
And he stepped down, and laid his hand
On a man who came from another land.
And we breathed again, for another's grief
At the Hangman's hand was our relief
And the gallows-frame on the courthouse lawn
By tomorrow's sun would be struck and gone.
So we gave him way, and no one spoke,
Out of respect for his Hangman's cloak.
The next day's sun looked mildly down
On roof and street in our quiet town,
And stark and black in the morning air
Was the gallows-tree in the courthouse square.
And the Hangman stood at his usual stand
With the yellow hemp in his busy hand;
With his buckshot eye and his jaw like a pike
And his air so knowing and business-like.
And we cried, "Hangman, have you not done
Yesterday, with the foreign one?"
Then we fell silent, and stood amazed,
"Oh, not for him was the gallows raised."
He laughed a laugh as he looked at us:
"Did you think I'd gone to all this fuss
To hang one man? That's a thing I do
To stretch a rope when the rope is new."
Then one cried "Murder!" and one cried "Shame!"
And into our midst the Hangman came
To that man's place. "Do you hold," said he,
"with him that was meant for the gallows-tree?"
And he laid his hand on that one's arm.
And we shrank back in quick alarm!
And we gave him way, and no one spoke
Out of fear of his Hangman's cloak.
That night we saw with dread surprise
The Hangman's scaffold had grown in size.
Fed by the blood beneath the chute,
The gallows-tree had taken root;
Now as wide, or a little more,
Than the steps that led to the courthouse door,
As tall as the writing, or nearly as tall,
Halfway up on the courthouse wall.
The third he took -- we had all heard tell --
Was a usurer, and an infidel.
"What," said the Hangman "have you to do
With the gallows-bound, and he a Jew?"
And we cried out, "Is this one he
Who has served you well and faithfully?"
The Hangman smiled: "It's a clever scheme
to try the strength of the gallows-beam."
The fourth man's dark, accusing song
Had scratched our comfort hard and long;
"And what concern," he gave us back.
"Have you for the doomed -- the doomed and Black?"
The fifth. The sixth. And we cried again,
"Hangman, Hangman, is this the man?"
"It's a trick," he said. "that we hangmen know
For easing the trap when the trap springs slow."
And so we ceased, and asked no more,
As the Hangman tallied his bloody score.
And sun by sun, and night by night,
The gallows grew to monstrous height.
The wings of the scaffold opened wide
Till they covered the square from side to side;
And the monster cross-beam, looking down,
Cast its shadow across the town.
Then through the town the Hangman came,
Through the empty streets, and called my name --
And I looked at the gallows soaring tall,
And thought, "There is no one left at all
For hanging, and so he calls to me
To help pull down the gallows-tree."
So I went out with right good hope
To the Hangman's tree and the Hangman's rope.
He smiled at me as I came down
To the courthouse square through the silent town.
And supple and stretched in his busy hand
Was the yellow twist of the hempen strand.
And he whistled his tune as he tried the trap,
And it sprang down with a ready snap --
And then with a smile of awful command
He laid his hand upon my hand.
"You tricked me. Hangman!," I shouted then,
"That your scaffold was built for other men...
And I no henchman of yours," I cried,
"You lied to me, Hangman. Foully lied!"
Then a twinkle grew in the buckshot eye,
"Lied to you? Tricked you?" he said. "Not I.
For I answered straight and I told you true --
The scaffold was raised for none but you.
For who has served me more faithfully
Then you with your coward's hope?" said he,
"And where are the others who might have stood
Side by your side in the common good?"
"Dead," I whispered. And amiably
"Murdered," the Hangman corrected me:
"First the foreigner, then the Jew...
I did no more than you let me do."
Beneath the beam that blocked the sky
None had stood so alone as I.
The Hangman noosed me, and no voice there
Cried "Stop!" for me in the empty square.

Maurice Ogden

Friday 8 May 2009

Pathetic cops.

Fuck almighty. That's all I can say about this:

Northumbria Police is getting rid of its £200,000 motorcycle fleet over health and safety fears.

That's so astonishingly pathetic that it bears repeating.

Northumbria Police is getting rid of its £200,000 motorcycle fleet over health and safety fears.
The police force decided to sell off all the Honda and BMW bikes after deciding that officers using them were "particularly vulnerable to collision".
The force has been criticised for losing a valuable resource but senior officers have insisted that the move will "maximise officer safety".

No surprise that this comes from elfin safety obsessed high ups, nor that the actual boys and girls in blue seem less than impressed.

Russ Watson, chairman of Northumbria Police Federation, said: "There are very few forces that do not have a motorcycle capacity.
"Used in the right context, motorbikes are an essential resource. They can get into places that cars have difficulty getting to such as in heavy traffic."
One serving officer, who asked not to be named, added: "I guess with all the health and safety red tape surrounding the police service these days their days were always going to be numbered.
"It's a great shame we won't be able to use them any more – cars just aren't the same. Maybe they'll offer us push bikes instead – as long as we can produce our cycling proficiency test certificates, obviously "

Against which we have:

Defending the move, Chief Superintendent Neil Mackay, head of Northumbria Police's operations department, told Police Review magazine: "A decision was taken on 7 April, with immediate effect, to dissolve the force's motorcycle capability to maximise the safety of officers.
"There will be no loss of service to the public. Everything that can be done with a bike can also be done with a car."

Ch Supt Mackay there, a senior copper who has clearly swallowed the blue pill - "Everything that can be done with a bike can also be done with a car." You don't have to ride bikes (and I don't) to see what bollocks that is. A rank and file copper suggests that motorbikes can get to places that cars can't and points out the obvious advantage they have in heavy traffic, obvious that is to any car driver who's been sat still in a jam and been passed by bikers. Meanwhile a senior officer sticks his fingers in his ears and basically says "nonononononono not true not true lalalalalalala I'm not listening lalalalalalalalala cars are just as good". Can he seriously believe what he's saying I wonder, or is he happy to just flap his lips while a useful bit of kit is sacrificed on the altar of elfin safety? Yet another argument, as if one were needed, for having locally elected police chiefs who'd have to consider how the public might see this sort of thing if they wanted to keep their jobs long term.

Northumbria Police - we'll investigate crime and patrol the roads, but Mummy says we have to be home before it gets dark. Pathetic.