The Angry Exile: Defending Kevin Rudd.

The Hangman

Into our town the Hangman came,
Smelling of gold and blood and flame.
And he paced our bricks with a diffident air,
And built his frame in the courthouse square.
The scaffold stood by the courthouse side,
Only as wide as the door was wide;
A frame as tall, or little more,
Than the capping sill of the courthouse door.
And we wondered, whenever we had the time,
Who the criminal, what the crime
That the Hangman judged with the yellow twist
of knotted hemp in his busy fist.
And innocent though we were, with dread,
We passed those eyes of buckshot lead --
Till one cried: "Hangman, who is he
For whom you raised the gallows-tree?"
Then a twinkle grew in the buckshot eye,
And he gave us a riddle instead of reply:
"He who serves me best," said he,
"Shall earn the rope of the gallows-tree."
And he stepped down, and laid his hand
On a man who came from another land.
And we breathed again, for another's grief
At the Hangman's hand was our relief
And the gallows-frame on the courthouse lawn
By tomorrow's sun would be struck and gone.
So we gave him way, and no one spoke,
Out of respect for his Hangman's cloak.
The next day's sun looked mildly down
On roof and street in our quiet town,
And stark and black in the morning air
Was the gallows-tree in the courthouse square.
And the Hangman stood at his usual stand
With the yellow hemp in his busy hand;
With his buckshot eye and his jaw like a pike
And his air so knowing and business-like.
And we cried, "Hangman, have you not done
Yesterday, with the foreign one?"
Then we fell silent, and stood amazed,
"Oh, not for him was the gallows raised."
He laughed a laugh as he looked at us:
"Did you think I'd gone to all this fuss
To hang one man? That's a thing I do
To stretch a rope when the rope is new."
Then one cried "Murder!" and one cried "Shame!"
And into our midst the Hangman came
To that man's place. "Do you hold," said he,
"with him that was meant for the gallows-tree?"
And he laid his hand on that one's arm.
And we shrank back in quick alarm!
And we gave him way, and no one spoke
Out of fear of his Hangman's cloak.
That night we saw with dread surprise
The Hangman's scaffold had grown in size.
Fed by the blood beneath the chute,
The gallows-tree had taken root;
Now as wide, or a little more,
Than the steps that led to the courthouse door,
As tall as the writing, or nearly as tall,
Halfway up on the courthouse wall.
The third he took -- we had all heard tell --
Was a usurer, and an infidel.
"What," said the Hangman "have you to do
With the gallows-bound, and he a Jew?"
And we cried out, "Is this one he
Who has served you well and faithfully?"
The Hangman smiled: "It's a clever scheme
to try the strength of the gallows-beam."
The fourth man's dark, accusing song
Had scratched our comfort hard and long;
"And what concern," he gave us back.
"Have you for the doomed -- the doomed and Black?"
The fifth. The sixth. And we cried again,
"Hangman, Hangman, is this the man?"
"It's a trick," he said. "that we hangmen know
For easing the trap when the trap springs slow."
And so we ceased, and asked no more,
As the Hangman tallied his bloody score.
And sun by sun, and night by night,
The gallows grew to monstrous height.
The wings of the scaffold opened wide
Till they covered the square from side to side;
And the monster cross-beam, looking down,
Cast its shadow across the town.
Then through the town the Hangman came,
Through the empty streets, and called my name --
And I looked at the gallows soaring tall,
And thought, "There is no one left at all
For hanging, and so he calls to me
To help pull down the gallows-tree."
So I went out with right good hope
To the Hangman's tree and the Hangman's rope.
He smiled at me as I came down
To the courthouse square through the silent town.
And supple and stretched in his busy hand
Was the yellow twist of the hempen strand.
And he whistled his tune as he tried the trap,
And it sprang down with a ready snap --
And then with a smile of awful command
He laid his hand upon my hand.
"You tricked me. Hangman!," I shouted then,
"That your scaffold was built for other men...
And I no henchman of yours," I cried,
"You lied to me, Hangman. Foully lied!"
Then a twinkle grew in the buckshot eye,
"Lied to you? Tricked you?" he said. "Not I.
For I answered straight and I told you true --
The scaffold was raised for none but you.
For who has served me more faithfully
Then you with your coward's hope?" said he,
"And where are the others who might have stood
Side by your side in the common good?"
"Dead," I whispered. And amiably
"Murdered," the Hangman corrected me:
"First the foreigner, then the Jew...
I did no more than you let me do."
Beneath the beam that blocked the sky
None had stood so alone as I.
The Hangman noosed me, and no voice there
Cried "Stop!" for me in the empty square.

Maurice Ogden

Tuesday 10 March 2009

Defending Kevin Rudd.

It's professional offence taking time again. ~~Kevin Bloody Wilson~~, sorry I mean Kevin Rudd the PM has - shock, horror - said a naughty word. On air. Live. He said "shitstorm".... ummmm.

We've actually got two controversies for the price of one here. First the opposition have accused Rudd of saying it on purpose to come across as a bit more blokey, a bit more matey and a bit less of the boring bastard that half the country perceives him as. Maybe he did, maybe he didn't, I really don't care. I'm more interested to know why the (so called but in reality not really very) Liberals aren't questioning Rudd's whole line of reasoning about government intervention versus the free market. Personally I'd be pointing out that obviously the free market won't sort it out because the free market doesn't fucking exist precisely because of people like Kevin Rudd. He might as well have said Papa Smurf and his troup of dancing Drop Bears in place of the words "free market". Of course the Lib's silence on that point might have something to do with the fact that the free market also doesn't exist because of people like the Libs. But really, is this "ooooh it was all scripted" the best they can do? Who gives a flying fuck one way or the other? I'm not suddenly going to come over all impressed because he's sworn on TV and I very much doubt anyone else will change their opinions of him much.

But moving swiftly on to the inevitable offence takers, we have this:

The Schizophrenia Research Institute (SRI) has called for Australia's top politician to give up swearing and help raise money for research into the nation's third leading cause of disability.

The challenge is part of the institute's inaugural SwearStop campaign that takes place from May 18-24 as part of Schizophrenia Awareness Week and involves people being sponsored by family and friends to stop swearing.

What the hell has swearing got to do with schizophrenia? I'm sure sufferers swear, but so do I and I'm reasonably sure I'm not schizophrenic. It's not like he took the piss out of the mentally ill, and even if he'd crossed his eyes and licked the nearest window I'd call it free expression which is a right enjoyed even by politicians. So on that basis I'd like to propose an inaugural InterfereStop as part of a new Busybody Awareness Week and tell the finger wagging twats to fuck off.

Right, how much did that cost me?