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Cheers - AE

Tuesday, 1 March 2011

Larf of the day

From The Tele:
The Prime Minister disclosed that he would not rule out “the use of military assets” as Britain “must not tolerate this regime using military forces against its own people”.
Er, Dave? What military assets? Sure, you can send a sub to lob a Tomahawk or two in Gaddafi's direction, though at more than half a million dollars a shot you probably need to ask the bank manager first. Other than that Britain has one aircraft carrier, which an ex-navy mate once told me is not a proper aircraft carrier anyway, but with all the Harriers gone it's not quite clear what use it'd be. You have a couple of landing ships plus HMS Ocean, but of course the Army is still busy fighting Tony Blair's pet war or enjoying the finest German porn the Rhineland's cities have to offer while helping guard them against any East German force that attempts to cross No Man's Land. You do have more than a hundred Tornado ground attack aircraft, though presumably some of them are in the 'Stan and Germany too, but of course you're getting rid of a load of pilots of all types which eventually restrict your ability even to have cargo aircraft dropping manure on people. And you still can't do that anyway as it probably counts as bio-war, and in any case you're years away from having Airbus's bigger, better, pricier, later version of the Hercules to help.

So don't you think you're stretched a little bit thin for credible sabre rattling, Dave? Or are you planning to ask the Libyans if they wouldn't mind waiting another 5-10 years, because with the mess that Colostomy Brown left for you to clear up you really can't manage anything much more beyond a marathon session of Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare?

Take your hand off it, Dave. Nobody's fooled.
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