Give us money and you can be PM - UPDATED

Not even polling day yet but already people are attempting to make deals, and this one boils my piss.

Northern Ireland MPs have indicated that they will formally back the Conservative leader if he protects the region from this year’s public spending cuts. The move would cost up to £200million.

That's the going rate for the 18 people representing a couple of million people, is it? £200 million that has to be taken either from services elsewhere in the UK on top of any other necessary cuts, or simply right out of the wallets of the taxpayers there. Any agreement will confirm my long held suspicion that iDave will do and say practically anything to get into power and put to rest any fears that I may have had that perhaps voting Tory was worth it to get rid of Colostomy Brown. If iDave doesn't tell them to go fuck themselves with a rusty spade I'll be very disappointed, though not remotely surprised.

On the other hand iDave is the preferred choice of Exlax Factor judge Simon Cowell. So that's alright then.

Cunts.


UPDATE - Simon Cowell's support of the Tories has been Mashed.

BRITAIN finally hurtled beyond the point of no return last night as the political opinions of Simon Cowell were regarded as important.

Around the world dozens of nations have expelled British diplomats, closed embassies and commandeered British businesses after the voting intention of the inventor of Shit Factor and Britain Must be Stopped was the lead story in the country's biggest newspaper the day before a general election.

...

In Columbia, the leaders of the world's biggest drug cartels said British people were no longer good enough to buy their cocaine, while Osama Bin Laden insisted that he would not waste perfectly decent bombers on the British but stressed that if we continue to attach importance to any of Mr Cowell's opinions we will all be dead by the end of May anyway.